If you believe you are totally free spirited and free thinking find out for yourself. In total privacy and silence, set aside 10 minutes of your day for just one month, close your eyes and ears to the world and ask God, if he truly exists to let you know and show you, to actually give you a sign, so that you know truth from fiction. The only condition is that you ask fervently and sincerely and remain completely open. Don't let others influence or cloud your judgement, this is your life.