Calculus Ape Silver Plated Necklace

This is not a necklace, it is a pendant. The difference you ask? A necklace is an overpriced trinket worn by Victorian ladies to attract a suitor, someone with old vine or new oil money who would rescue them from their wretched life on the family estate where they were forced to ride ponies and wear corsets and read Jane Austen novelizations, and deliver them via Brougham to a life of droll costume balls until they eventually died in childbirth. A pendant is a reasonably-priced artifact that you wear to ward off bad mojo, and perhaps deflect a sniper's bullet. And what could provide stronger mojo protection than Calculus Ape? If there is such a thing, we don't want to know.