Relationships aren’t always a piece of cake, but the couples who weather the storms together, stay together. A healthy marriage involves a lot of effort, plenty of compassion and understanding, and a ton of love.
How to Have a Happy Marriage
There can be a lot of pressure on couples to have the ‘ideal’ happy marriage. It’s important to remember that at the end of the day, you and your spouse are only human. Life is not always going to be easy but having that special someone by your side can make the downs more bearable – and the ups more exhilarating.
Newly engaged couples often wonder (and get spooked) by what to expect when married. It can be hard not to listen to the classic marriage clichés that others joke about; marriage changes everything, you won’t be able to stand each other when ‘reality’ kicks in, and once the kids arrive, it’s never the same.
Marriage does take work, but there are a few things that can keep it running smoothly:
Healthy Marriage Tips
1. Open Communication – One of the most important parts of any relationship is to keep the line of communication open at all times. Speak candidly with each other while always remaining respectful, and understand that you won’t necessarily see eye-to-eye on everything. Take time out of your day to ask your other half how they are and what’s been going on. Avoiding a buildup of negative energy or frustration helps couples remain happy.
2. Acceptance – Remember you fell in love with your partner for who they are – the good and the ‘bad.’ Often, when going through a rough patch, we tend to focus on our significant other’s flaws and personality traits that we may sometimes find difficult to deal with. Accept your partner for who they are and remind yourself daily of the many wonderful things you love about them.
3. Saying ‘Sorry’ – It can be a hard lesson to learn, but no one is right all of the time. Realize that what you said or did may have had a negative impact on your partner, or made them feel a particular way. Be mature enough to apologize for the big and little things.
4. Taking Responsibility – If you’ve made a mistake or done something your partner doesn’t like, instead of arguing about it, take responsibility! Owning up to our words and actions not only allows us to grow on a personal level, but it lets those we love see that we are willing to learn from our blunders and move on.
5. Independence – Before you fell head over heels for the one you love, you probably had a very independent lifestyle. It’s important not to forego or give up parts of who you are when you’re in a relationship. Ensure you both take the time to do the things you love, be it reading, running, or meeting friends for coffee, on a regular basis.
6. Agreeing to Disagree – You’re not going to agree with everything your partner thinks, says and does. There’s no point arguing relentlessly about something you don’t agree on. Sometimes, you just have to agree to disagree and leave your differences at the door.
7. Tolerance – Life can be hard and we’re not always at our best. Learn to accept this and have tolerance for your partner if they’re having a bad day or there is a lot of stress in their life at a particular time.
8. Romance – Never let the romance die! Put aside time for date night, make romantic gestures, and nurture intimacy with your significant other. All of these things help us to connect and put our focus back on the positive energy love creates.
9. Letting Go – Learning to let go can be really tough, but it’s necessary for a healthy relationship. Don’t hold on to grudges and don’t let that argument from three days ago keep crawling back. Talk it out, take a breath, and let whatever it is go. The old saying ‘don’t go to bed angry’ holds true here!
10. Compliments – As we become comfortable in our relationships, we often forget to let loved ones know that we still think they’re beautiful or their new hair cut or outfit looks great. Sometimes, it’s the little things that have the most impact, and complimenting your other half regularly lets them know how loved they are and instills confidence. Give your partner a boost every now and then and remind yourself how great they truly are!
Background in Journalism and News Media. Avid aesthete, born bibliophile and confirmed cat-crazy. Happiest with a cup of tea in her hand and a furry friend by her side. Chocolate doesn’t hurt either. Firmly behind the grammar saves lives movement.
Great article Karen, can I just add to this that determinining whether you’re ‘financially’ compatible before marrige is important as finances can dominate married life more than they do ‘dating life’. Having a spender and saver in a partnership doesn’t work well in the end due to ongoing conflicts re money issues, so agreeing on these things before marriage can help.