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“Choose a Temperature, You Coward!” Hoodie

4.7 out of 5 stars rating
33927 Total Reviews |
by
Qty:
Style
Bella+Canvas Full-Zip Hoodie
-$39.85
-$38.80
-$41.10
-$30.95
Color & Print Process
White
Classic Printing: No Underbase
+$5.30
Vivid Printing: White Underbase
+$5.30
+$5.30
+$5.30

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Style: Adult Zip-Up Hoodie

This incredibly soft and relaxed unisex hoodie, spun from a plush poly-cotton blend, will quickly become your go-to essential. Perfect for everyday wear.

Size & Fit

  • Model is 6’1” and wearing a medium
  • Relaxed fit
  • Garment is unisex sizing
  • Hood with white drawstring
  • Full zip closure
  • Ribbed cuffs and waistband
  • Fits true to size

Fabric & Care

  • Solid Colors: 60% combed and ring-spun cotton 40% poly fleece, 30 single 6.5 oz.
  • Heathers: 90% combed and ring-spun cotton, 10% poly
  • Digital Fleece Colors: 100% poly, 32 single 6.5 oz.
  • Marble Fleece Colors: 85% combed and ring-spun cotton, 15% poly
  • Neon Colors: 60% combed and ring-spun cotton, 40% poly fleece, 30 single 6.5 oz.
  • Machine wash warm, inside out, with like colors. Only non-chlorine bleach
  • Tumble dry low. Medium iron. Do not iron decoration
  • Do not dry clean
  • Imported

About This Design

“Choose a Temperature, You Coward!” Hoodie

“Choose a Temperature, You Coward!” Hoodie

From the tragicomic depths of re: Cubicle 13 comes this wearable meltdown. Featuring an office marionette mid-breakroom breakdown, arms raised in existential rage, screaming at a cursed microwave with two impossible options: "Ice Age" or "Molten Fury." The microwave’s reads “Sad Snack,” taunting your fragile hopes with every beep. Whether you're undercooked or emotionally overdone, this hoodie captures that moment when reheating lunch becomes a philosophical crisis. Front: A small logo reading “Dept. of Mild Chaos” over the heart. Back: Full art print of the marionette showdown. Great for burned-out workers, passive-aggressive appliance survivors, and anyone who’s ever whispered, “I just wanted soup.”
The Bard of Bizarre
Artwork designed by
Front Royal, Virginia
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Customer Reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars rating33.9K Total Reviews
26601 total 5-star reviews5224 total 4-star reviews1138 total 3-star reviews509 total 2-star reviews455 total 1-star reviews
33,927 Reviews
Reviews for similar products
5 out of 5 stars rating
By Dan G.November 6, 2025 • Verified Purchase
Bella+Canvas Full-Zip Hoodie, Black, Adult XS
Creator Review
Great soft warm sweatshirt cool artwork design.
5 out of 5 stars rating
By Candace B.November 24, 2025 • Verified Purchase
Bella+Canvas Full-Zip Hoodie, Navy, Adult L
Just what I wanted. Thanks for having zipper hoodies.
5 out of 5 stars rating
By J.April 14, 2023 • Verified Purchase
Adult Pullover Hoodie, Black, Adult L
Zazzle Reviewer Program
Hoodie is super comfortable. It is very good quality & is true to size on fit. The custom design & logos are very professional & are high quality. Turned out excellent, very happy with my purchase.

Tags

T-Shirts
microwavemeltdownofficecomedymarionettehumorfunnyhoodie
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microwavemeltdownofficecomedymarionettehumorfunnyhoodie

Other Info

Product ID: 256149998441015193
Created on: 7/8/2025, 9:10 PM
Rating: G