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Are traditional greeting cards just not meeting your needs? Do you need something with a little more snark and gloom? When Hallmark cards are too wholesome, come to Crustacean Salutations and find the perfect message of bitter misanthropy for your loved (or unloved) ones!
Tell them how you really feel.
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"Days are bad" mug for grumps
Sale Price $13.16. Original Price $16.45. Comp. value
"I have to get out of here" shovel shirt (dark)
Sale Price $13.68. Original Price $17.10. Comp. value
DAYS ARE BAD mug
Sale Price $10.60. Original Price $13.25. Comp. value
Cold, Dark, & Salty Mug
Sale Price $10.36. Original Price $12.95. Comp. value
"You light up my life" anglerfish shirt
Sale Price $15.28. Original Price $19.10. Comp. value
"I'm not giving up" poster (portrait)
Sale Price $13.32. Original Price $16.65. Comp. value
!["Ask me about my shirt" [extra meta version] T-Shirt](https://rlv.zcache.com/ask_me_about_my_shirt_extra_meta_version_t_shirt-r2dadb8f8814b49cda3f8e1ed0d76e52e_k2gm8_324.jpg)
"Ask me about my shirt" [extra meta version] T-Shirt
Sale Price $13.96. Original Price $17.45. Comp. value
!["Ask me about my shirt that says, " [dark color]](https://rlv.zcache.com/ask_me_about_my_shirt_that_says_dark_color-r2dc0efbae5b44fa1b94732eb4b543d8b_k2gm8_324.jpg)
"Ask me about my shirt that says, " [dark color]
Sale Price $13.96. Original Price $17.45. Comp. value
"I'm not giving up" poster (landscape)
Sale Price $16.72. Original Price $20.90. Comp. value
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Valentines
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Find love at CrustaceanSingles.com (sticker) Square Sticker
Sale Price $5.85. Original Price $8.35. Comp. value
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"Ask me about my shirt" [extra meta version] T-Shirt
Sale Price $13.96. Original Price $17.45. Comp. value
Save 30%
Funny Birthday: Cake Full of Spiders Card
Sale Price $2.46. Original Price $3.51. Comp. value
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Funny Birthday: Count the Rings Card
Sale Price $2.46. Original Price $3.51. Comp. value
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Punny Goodbye: Deep-Archer (departure) Card
Sale Price $2.46. Original Price $3.51. Comp. value
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I want to get back in touch with you (original) card
Sale Price $2.38. Original Price $3.40. Comp. value
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"You light up my life" anglerfish shirt
Sale Price $15.28. Original Price $19.10. Comp. value
Save 20%
"I'm not giving up" poster (landscape)
Sale Price $16.72. Original Price $20.90. Comp. value
Save 30%
Funny Goodbye: I'm going to miss you a lot Card
Sale Price $2.46. Original Price $3.51. Comp. value
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